Nerds Make Science Fun!

This is a rather well-known video, and it appears in a lot of places.

Now, go to the bathroom and empty your bladder.

Done? Good.

Now, “You’ve gotta be shiftin’ me” the hilarous rebuttal.

(link) (Warning, slightly vulgar)

Tony

You can have pandas as pets now. Take a look.

Note:It’s not a real panda, it’s a groomed dog.

William

Kudos if you recognize what the title references.

I thought I saw the full extent of human idiocy when I discovered Kent Hovind and Jack Chick. I was very wrong. Recently, I did a search for “creation science fair” on Google, considering I had first heard the term in a joke, and I was looking for that joke. However, on the list of results, I found links for actual creationist science fairs. I browsed a few of the sites, and I feel that the site by Objective Ministries is the most ignorant and fallacious.

For example:

•    “Cassidy Turnbull (grade five) presented her uncle, Steve. She also showed photographs of monkeys and invited fairgoers to note the differences between her uncle and the monkeys. She tried to feed her uncle bananas, but he declined to eat them. Cassidy has conclusively shown that her uncle is no monkey.”

I don’t think I even need to show how ridiculous is, but I will anyway. A common creationist misconception is that humans are descended from monkeys. This is not true; rather, humans and monkeys once shared a common ancestor, and over time, some members of this common ancestor species accumulated traits that caused them to become humans.

•    “Patricia Lewis (grade eight) did an experiment to see if life can evolve from non-life. Patricia placed all the non-living ingredients of life - carbon (a charcoal briquet), purified water, and assorted minerals (a multi-vitamin) - into a sealed glass jar. The jar was left undisturbed, being exposed only to sunlight, for three weeks. (Patricia also prayed to God not to do anything miraculous during the course of the experiment, so as not to disqualify the findings.) No life evolved. This shows that life cannot come from non-life through natural processes.”

Not only did they spell “briquette” wrong, this “experiment” has no scientific basis. First, evolution does not deal with the origin of life; it is only concerned with how life developed and progressed. Second, abiogenesis does not say that you get life by dumping a bunch of materials into a jar and exposing them to sunlight. Current theories state that in the early atmosphere, there was a mix of methane, water, ammonia, and other substances. In these conditions electrical activity such as lightning can cause organic molecules like amino acids (which are the key building blocks of life) to form. Then, through a series of processes that we do not yet understand, these building blocks arranged themselves into protocells, which later developed into cells.

And seriously, prayer affects experiments?

These “experiments” demonstrate how scientifically illiterate creationists are. Yes, kids in grades K-8 performed these experiments. However, what really bothers me is that children are being manipulated into brainwashing themselves with experiments by organizations like Objective Ministries. They are being denied the basic education in science that is necessary to survive in this world of ours because organizations like Objective Ministries are more interested in keeping their heads in the sand rather than teaching people about the real world.

Incidentally, you should also check out the reasons why they consider Apple demonic. This is not an exaggeration.

Objective Ministries

Check out Evolutionism Propaganda and the Creation Science Fair.

William

Words fail to describe how horribly Kent Hovind fails science.

Likewise, words fail to describe the beauty of this site.

http://kent-hovind.com/

(anti-hovind, by the way)

Tony

Chick demonstrates his utter lack of scientific understanding with his comic “There Go the Dinosaurs”. Let’s take a look at some of the holes in his argument:

• The people hunting the dinosaur in the first story seem to be around from 3000 years ago. Why are they dressed like pilgrims?
• According to the Bible, the Ark was 450 feet long, 75 feet wide, and 45 feet high. Assuming a boxish shape, the Ark had a maximum volume of 1,518,750 cubic feet. This is volume of approximately 14.5 Olympic sized swimming pools. Pretty big. Now, in 2004, there were 4,629 known mammal species, and according to creationism, there were probably more before they went extinct. Taking that into account, even if every single square inch of the ark was dedicated to carrying animals, they would not even be able to fit in all the mammals, let alone much of the chordata phylum, which includes all mammals, reptiles, and fish. Not to mention the food that it would take to feed them all.
• If the flood killed all plants, people, and dinosaurs, shouldn’t they be in the same stratum (rock layers)?
• Funnily enough, Chick debunks the flood in this comic when he mentions plants. How would plants have survived a year underwater? Without plants, no oxygen would be produced and all life would’ve died of hypoxia (lack of oxygen). Also, the food chain would’ve been uprooted, so even if the passengers of the Ark magically started breathing some other gas, they would die of hunger.
• There would be no insects alive if the flood were true, since the Bible states the only things taken on were creatures with nostrils.

Ah, nothing is more fun than pointing out the stupidity of a creationist.

If you enjoy their stupidity, feel free to check out Kent Hovind’s bungling of biology, which is also included on this site.

William

First, before I forget, happy new year from us Nerds.

Now:

http://www.chick.com/reading/tracts/1041/1041_01.asp

… Would anybody be this stupid, gullible, or downright ridiculous?

Sure, I’m a Christian (a theistic evolutionist, for lack of better words) but this… words can’t describe the stupidity, but here’s my best shot.

The author of this thing (Jack Chick) does not seem to know anything about evolution. For one, evolution does not say dots turned into polywogs, into fishes, into amphibians, into primates, into humans. It did not happen in a “few” million years. A “few” usually refers to under ten,  and that’s stretching it a bit. I could continue with the scientific inaccuracies, but I’ll move on to the sheer stupidity.

Here’s a list, because I can’t put this into coherent paragraphs.

• It portrays evolutionists as dumb, gullible, and unquestioning, as well as posessed by Satan.
• It says evolution is a religion. Is math a religion then? Next.
• It brings in the whole “master race” thing. Now, I’m not too sure of the accuracy of the rest of the bullet point, but here goes. Evolution does away with races, since, in general, two organisms that can breed to form fertile offspring are members of the same species.
• Again, not sure of the accuracy here. I’m learning in computers, not biology. I’ll have Bill look over this later. Evolution is not focused on the survival of the individual, but of the species, so all that “get away with murder” crap goes against evolution, because in evolutionary terms, the fittest are those best suited to their environment, and murders are certainly not suited to the current environment of humanity. Natural selection will kick in when you’re in prison for life. No species needs saboteurs. A varied gene pool also helps the species, so that it’s more resistant to being wiped out, like (highlight for spoilers) the aliens in War of the Worlds being wiped out by a single disease.…
• Evolutionists are portrayed as racists, murderers, and proponents of genocide. Funny, since the bible seems to have multiple genocides, commanded by God himself. Now why don’t they ever mention that?
• Science can’t prove there’s no heaven or no god, since science deals with empirical evidence. Science is powerful, but it can’t do everything. The best we have to deal with at the moment is subjective evidence.
• While I’m at it, notice the deranged look in the kid’s eyes?
• Now with 50% more idiocy! The boy calls the girl “dangerous” and says Jesus is banned in schools. Last I checked, religion wasn’t banned in schools. Organized religion was.
• So the kid (portrayed as atheist) says he’s a god just like Jesus? Right…
• I seem to have run out of ammo. As one last parting shot, what would you want to be taught in schools?
• A) The findings of scientists, who have consistently verified their results (contrary to what some fundamentalists would tell you. Surprise! Jack Chick is a fundamentalist too, right alongside Kent Hovind, of “Biology Bungling”!).
• B) The word spread by an invisible man in the sky, which, when interpreted literally (like the fundamentalists do), is torn apart by all evidence available as well as itself.

That was longer than expected. Well, I’ll just leave with some more shots at Christianity (well, more like Christians, but my diction sucks).

50 Best Reasons Gay Marriage is Wrong (massive satire)

You can also browse Jack Chick’s site here or check out more of his silly cartoons here, such as
this gem about dinosaurs, which I may pick apart later.

Warning: not safe for your sanity. Prolonged exposure may cause brain damage and circular logic. Do not view more than one strip at a time.

Yes, I know I probably offended any Fundamentalists who are reading these. But hey, we can’t have people offended on the internet, can we? No sir!

I really need to see if I can create a <sarcasm> html element.